Don’t think that the good days are from Jesus and the bad days aren’t. Things don’t happen by accident, they are purposeful and orchestrated, always.
In the day of prosperity be joyful,
But in the day of adversity consider:
Surely God has appointed the one as well as the other
I remember wondering about that portion of Handel’s Messiah where the choir sings,
Every valley shall be exalted, and every mountain and hill made low, the crooked straight, and the rough places plain.
thinking, “why would we want just flat land with straight roads, heck, we’d be in Kansas!”
We live in a crooked, rough world full of sin, sadness and suffering. Wise people and fools live in this crooked world but wise people understand God’s plan includes crooked things, fools never learn. Fools try to change the course that God has set before them, wise people learn to navigate. So, how does the wise person navigate through the rough hard things in life?
1. Wise people begin by understanding God did not intend for us to have an easy, carefree, simple, painless life.
2. Wise people understand they are not God’s public relations with a slapped on happy face. In the day of adversity wise people embrace grief. Wise people go through sadness and mourning, while foolish people try to ignore it.
Better to go to the house of mourning
Than to go to the house of feasting,
Sorrow is better than laughter
The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning
When times are sad, you need to mourn, go through it. Eating, drinking and partying when you’re depressed is foolish. But then, when times improve, eat, drink and be merry. When times are bad, mourn and grieve but then when times are good, play Settlers of Catan with your kids, go to Baskin Robbins for ice cream, and read books to them in bed.
3. Wise people choose their friends carefully. He who walks with the wise grows wise.
It is better to hear the rebuke of the wise
Than for a man to hear the song of fools.
Wise people have friends who will pray for them and be there for them.
4. Wise people accept that ultimately bad days come from God. Ministry to others comes out of pain and brokenness, we don’t wish for it and we wouldn’t choose it but through it we are able to talk about God’s goodness in a way that convinces.
My example here is fairly trivial but in the mind of eleven and thirteen year olds it looms a bit bigger and really, that is where trials begin. Matthias is on the losing-est baseball team this year and Taite was left in the dust in her dance class because while others of her age were progressing in dance, we did not have the finances to put her there. Did we sin as parents? Did Taite sin? Did Matthias? Does God hate us!? No, He loves us.
He knows that if we lived a simple, carefree, painless life we would never need Him, we would never seek Him, and ultimately we would die apart from Him. So, he brings us trials. God has made our lives complicated and crooked on purpose but one day He shall make “Every valley exalted, and every mountain and hill made low, the crooked straight, and the rough places plain.”
Could Matthias have been placed on a winning team? You bet. Could Taite have been dancing with girls her own age? For sure.
And so, Taite and Matthias have had the privilege of misery in their young lives, to be humiliated and miserable through no fault of theirs. That is where God will work. They have been able to say, “This stinks,” and then move on knowing by faith and not by what they see right now, ‘that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.’
As we discussed this Matt proclaimed triumphantly, “If it’s true that good things come out of bad, we’ve got a whole lot of good coming!”
Very well said! If we never experienced sadness…we wouldn’t truly know what gladness is. If we didn’t experience loss, we would not fully appreciate gain. We need to experience both ends of the spectrum to fully appreciate the other.
Thank-you Terri for speaking Biblical truth. I needed to hear your words today.
That is such a good reminder- so beautifully put.
I think the hardest part about this is how easy it is to remain in the rut of misery. Self pity and unthankfulness can bog you down so much that you foget God’s love. And once in the mindset of forgetting God’s goodness, you won’t know how to eat drink and enjoy life, even if God plops you in the middle of the party.
Yes, the hard part for me is to mourn, admit the situation stinks AND THEN MOVE ON.
It has helped me to evaluate whether a trial is the result of sin or not and if not well, it’s sobering and sad but not my fault. If a trial is due to sin, time to work that out.
It is funny you should post this. I just asked Eric last night if he thought it would be nice to have no feelings at all. He didn’t think so.
I guess it is true that you need sorrow to feel joy.
On the same note I’m listening to a sermon by Tim Keller called “Praying Our Tears” and it is excellent.
Terri,
Oh, but I could write volumes here. Mostly, I thank you, because today I needed these words. If our trials are from sin, we can be thankful that He is disciplining us, because that’s what real love does when appropriate. I don’t know how important it is to know whether our trials are sin or not, however. What is important to me, though, is that I keep my heart open, soft and willing to see and acknowledge when it is sin. The longer I live the more I know most of what passes here is a test of our faith. We just need to be obedient to His word and truths and keep putting one foot in front of another, thanking him for each day as it comes.
I loved David’s attitude when he mourned for his dying son due to his sin and your essay speaks to this.
“David therefore sought God on behalf of the child. And David fasted and went in and lay all night on the ground. And the elders of his house stood beside him, to raise him from the ground, but he would not, nor did he eat food with them. On the seventh day the child died. And the servants of David were afraid to tell him that the child was dead, for they said, “Behold, while the child was yet alive, we spoke to him, and he did not listen to us. How then can we say to him the child is dead? He may do himself some harm.” But when David saw that his servants were whispering together, David understood that the child was dead. And David said to his servants, “Is the child dead?” They said, “He is dead.” Then David arose from the earth and washed and anointed himself and changed his clothes. And he went into the house of the LORD and worshiped. He then went to his own house. And when he asked, they set food before him, and he ate. Then his servants said to him, “What is this thing that you have done? You fasted and wept for the child while he was alive; but when the child died, you arose and ate food.” He said, “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept, for I said, ‘Who knows whether the LORD will be gracious to me, that the child may live?’ But now he is dead. Why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he will not return to me.”” 2 Samuel 12:16-23
Keep writing. I love it!
I am glad this has been helpful and I need to remember to come back and read it again occasionally…